Getting There (2)

They said to Him, ’Rabbi . . . where are You staying?’ He said to them, ’Come and see’ (John 1:38-39).

Where our self-interest sleeps and the real interest is awakened. “They . . . remained with Him that day . . . .” That is about all some of us ever do. We stay with Him a short time, only to wake up to our own realities of life. Our self-interest rises up and our abiding with Him is past. Yet there is no circumstance of life in which we cannot abide in Jesus.

“You are Simon . . . . You shall be called Cephas” (John 1:42). God writes our new name only on those places in our lives where He has erased our pride, self-sufficiency, and self-interest. Some of us have our new name written only in certain spots, like spiritual measles. And in those areas of our lives we look all right. When we are in our best spiritual mood, you would think we were the highest quality saints. But don’t dare look at us when we are not in that mood. A true disciple is one who has his new name written all over him - self-interest, pride, and self-sufficiency have been completely erased.

Pride is the sin of making “self” our god. And some of us today do this, not like the Pharisee, but like the tax collector (see Luke 18:9-14). For you to say, “Oh, I’m no saint,” is acceptable by human standards of pride, but it is unconscious blasphemy against God. You defy God to make you a saint, as if to say, “I am too weak and hopeless and outside the reach of the atonement by the Cross of Christ.” Why aren’t you a saint? It is either that you do not want to be a saint, or that you do not believe that God can make you into one. You say it would be all right if God saved you and took you straight to heaven. That is exactly what He will do! And not only do we make our home with Him, but Jesus said of His Father and Himself, “. . . We will come to him and make Our home with him” (John 14:23). Put no conditions on your life - let Jesus be everything to you, and He will take you home with Him not only for a day, but for eternity.

~ John 1:38-39
38 Turning around, Jesus saw them following and asked, “What do you want?” They said, “Rabbi” (which means “Teacher”), “where are you staying?” 39 “Come,” he replied, “and you will see.” So they went and saw where he was staying, and they spent that day with him. It was about four in the afternoon.


~ John 1:42
42 And he brought him to Jesus. Jesus looked at him and said, “You are Simon son of John. You will be called Cephas” (which, when translated, is Peter)


~ Luke 18:9-14
9 To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everyone else, Jesus told this parable: 10 “Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. 11 The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. 12 I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’ 13 “But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’ 14 “I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”


~ John 14:23
23 Jesus replied, “Anyone who loves me will obey my teaching. My Father will love them, and we will come to them and make our home with them.

You can not pick an choose when you want God in your life!  You can't only want him in your time of need!  I want God all the time, I want him when I am having the best days and the worst!  I don't only want him to stay in my life for short periods.  I want my new name written in bold, underlined, bright ink all over me for the world to see!  I want it to be evident in my relationship with Jesus Christ.  I don't want people to have to wonder if I am a Christian.  I WILL, from this day forward, show my love for God everywhere I go!  When someone says to me "Well aren't you just a saint?"  I will respond with "Why yes, yes I am!!"  

I don't want to be one of these people who, when behind closed doors, they have nothing to do with God.  No, let me rephrase that, I WILL NOT be one of those people.  Can someone truly live a happy guilt free life by only having a relationship with Him publicly?  I know I was not happy.  I was once one of those people, not on purpose, but I was.  You can't only show up to church on Sunday to Praise God, and not think about Him any other day of the week.  Thank God I have changed my ways.  I am a new me forever, and very proud of it!  Jesus is Everything to me!

Getting There

"Come to Me . . ." (Matthew 11:28).

Where sin and sorrow stops, and the song of the saint starts. Do I really want to get there? I can right now. The questions that truly matter in life are remarkably few, and they are all answered by these words -  “Come to Me.” Our Lord’s words are not, “Do this, or don’t do that,” but -  “Come to me.” If I will simply come to Jesus, my real life will be brought into harmony with my real desires. I will actually cease from sin, and will find the song of the Lord beginning in my life.

Have you ever come to Jesus? Look at the stubbornness of your heart. You would rather do anything than this one simple childlike thing -  “Come to Me.” If you really want to experience ceasing from sin, you must come to Jesus.

Jesus Christ makes Himself the test to determine your genuineness. Look how He used the word come. At the most unexpected moments in your life there is this whisper of the Lord -  “Come to Me,” and you are immediately drawn to Him. Personal contact with Jesus changes everything. Be “foolish” enough to come and commit yourself to what He says. The attitude necessary for you to come to Him is one where your will has made the determination to let go of everything and deliberately commit it all to Him.

“. . . and I will give you rest” -  that is, “I will sustain you, causing you to stand firm.” He is not saying, “I will put you to bed, hold your hand, and sing you to sleep.” But, in essence, He is saying, “I will get you out of bed— out of your listlessness and exhaustion, and out of your condition of being half dead while you are still alive. I will penetrate you with the spirit of life, and you will be sustained by the perfection of vital activity.” Yet we become so weak and pitiful and talk about “suffering” the will of the Lord! Where is the majestic vitality and the power of the Son of God in that?

~ Matthew 11:28
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.


Putting everything in the Lord's hands can be so challenging, but I am learning to do just that!  We have to trust, and have faith that he knows what is best for our lives.  A lot of times I have had a difficult time thinking about things too much.  I have to fully trust in the Lord, and "go to Him!"  When I first read "Be “foolish” enough to come and commit yourself to what He says," I had a hard time understanding what the word foolish meant.  I asked Steve for his help in my understanding, and to me he nailed it, and it made perfect sense!  You know how "foolish" some people can be in the sense that they don't think things through, or don't "research" things before they do stuff?  That is what I think this means when they use the word foolish.  God wants us to "Come to him" without thinking and analyzing it.  He wants us to have faith in him and not question why he wants us to do it! 

He doesn't only want us to "come to Him" in the good times, but in our times of need, sorrow, and grief.  He will not pacify us and let us weep.   He will pick us up, helps us to get out of the "bad place" we are in if we just "come to Him!"  How awesome that our God is so perfect that he is "begging" us to turn to him with everything we have and want to take on all of our happiness, and sorrows!  It is such a wonderful feeling knowing I can turn to him and give all my worries to him, and he will take care of me! 

And After That, What's Next To Do?

"...seek, and you will find..." (Luke 11:9)

Seek if you have not found.  "You ask and do not receive, because you ask amiss..." (James 4:3).  If you ask for things from life instead of from God, "you ask amiss";  that is, you ask out of your desire for self-fulfillment.  The more you fulfill yourself the less you will seek God.  "...seek, and you will find...."  Get to work - narrow you focus and interests to this one thing.  Have you ever sought God with your whole heart, or have you simply given Him a feeble cry after some emotionally painful experience?  "...seek, [focus,] and you will find...."

"Ho!  Everyone who thirsts, come to the waters.."  (Isaiah 55:1).  Are you thirsty, or complacent and indifferent - so satisfied with your own experience that you want nothing more of God?  Experience  is a doorway, not a final goal.  Beware of building your faith on experience, or your life will not ring true and will only sound the note of a critical spirit.  Remember that you can never give another person what you have found, but you can cause him to have a desire for it.

"...knock, and it will be opened to you"  (Luke 11:9).  "Draw near to God..." (James 4:8).  Knock - the door is closed, and your heartbeat races as you knock.  "Cleanse your hands..." (4:8).  Knock a bit louder - you begin to find that you are dirty.  "...purify your hearts..." (4:8).  It is becoming even more personal - you are desperate and serious now - you will do anything.  "Lament..." (4:9).  Have you ever lamented, expressing your sorrow before God for the condition of you inner life?  There is no thread of self-pity left, only the heart-rending difficulty and amazement which comes from seeing what kind of person you really are.  "Humble yourselves..." (4:10).  It is a humbling experience to knock at God's door - you have to knock with the crucified thief.  "...to him who knocks it will be opened" (Luke 11:10).

~ Luke 11:9-10
9 “So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 10 For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.

~ James 4:3
When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.

~ Isaiah 55:1
 “Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come, buy and eat!  Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost.

~ James 4:8-10
8 Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. 9 Grieve, mourn and wail. Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom. 10 Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.


I will be the first to admit that I have asked God for materialistic things in my own selfishness and personal gain.  I wish I could say that I never have, but unfortunately I have.  Fortunately we have a loving, wonderful, and forgiving God that will forgive us for such careless selfishness.  Anyone who has looked a prayer this way has missed what a Christian should be, including myself.  Although God may want you to have these things, it should never be your focus in life.  He has made in abundantly clear that our "treasures" should not be stored on earth and our live should never consist of things we possess.  I will most definitely be conscious of what I pray for.  I, never again, want to feel like the only time I cry out for God is in a time of tragedy or sorrow.  I want to praise God for all things in my life in the most unselfish way possible. 

I will always be "thirsty" for God!  I am so ashamed of myself, looking back, at so many times that I have been complacent in my life.  As my relationship grows with Him, I will never be "satisfied" enough to not want God.  I feel like I have done this so many times in my life, and never realized it until now.  Once again, I have to say, I am so thankful that we have such an amazing and merciful God, that he forgives such shameful behavior.  I am knock at God's door!  I have become so desperate for Him, that I have realized how "dirty" my life has been.  I am humbling myself before God, I am "lamenting" my self before him for my ways.  Please Lord, forgive me for my thoughtless selfish desires.  I want to humble myself, and live my life for you!  Thank you for your mercy! 

Then What's Next To Do?

"Everyone who asks receives..." (Luke 11:10)

Ask if you have not received.  There is nothing more difficult than asking.  We will have yearnings and desires for certain things, and even suffer as a result of their going unfulfilled, but not until we are at the limit of desperation will we ask.  It is the sense of not being spiritually real that causes us to ask.  Have you ever asked out of the depths of your total insufficiency and poverty?  "If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God..." (James 1:5), but be sure that you do lack wisdom before you ask.  You cannot bring yourself to the point of spiritual reality anytime you choose.  The best thing to do, once you realize you are not spiritually real, is to ask God for Holy Spirit, basing your request on the promise of Jesus Christ (See Luke 11:13).  The Holy Spirit is the one who makes everything that Jesus did  for you real in life.

"Everyone who asks receives...."  This does not mean you will not get if you do not ask, but it means that until you come to the point of asking, you will not receive form God (see Matthew 5:45).  To be able to receive means that you have come into the relationship of a child of God, and then you comprehend and appreciate mentally, morally, and with spiritual understanding, that these things come from God.

"If any of you lacks wisdom...."  If you realize that you are lacking, it is because you have come in contact with spiritual reality - do not put the blinders of reason on again.  The word ask actually means "beg."  Some people are poor enough to be interested in their poverty, and some of us are poor enough spiritually to show our lust, not out of our poverty.  A pauper does not ask out of any reason other than the completely hopeless and painful condition of his poverty.  He is not ashamed to beg - blessed are the paupers in spirit (see Matthew 5:3)


~ Luke 11:10
"For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened."

~ James 1:5
^"If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you."

~ Luke 11:13
"If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!"

~ Matthew 5:45
"that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous."

~ Matthew 5:3
"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven."


How true it is that the hardest thing to do is ask for help!  I have always hated asking for help, no matter what the circumstances are.  (unless it got to the point of putting my family in jeopardy of going without)  I guess you can call that a pride issue.  I have finally realized that asking for help is something that absolutely has to be done, whether it be something physically needed or spiritually.  I know in the four years Steve and I have been married, the first two were the absolute hardest.  We did have to ask for help, as much as I hated asking, there was no way we would have survived without it. 

The same goes for asking God for spiritual help.  You have to realize how poor you are to ask for help.  Unlike having to ask for help from other people, I WANT to be a pauper when asking God for his guidance wisdom.  I am not ashamed to admit that I will always need and want his help.  I want to receive his blessing and know they came from him.  Too many times, people take for granted what they are truly blessed by God with.  There have been so many times in my life where I have said "Thank you Jesus for...," but did I truly know that God blessed me, or was I just saying this out of relief that it happened?  (Or out of habit?) I by no means am saying that I wont ever take something for granted again, but I will say that my eyes are wide open, and I will know that God has blessed many for any given reason!  I will always ask for him, and pray to him! 

Thank you Lord for opening my eyes!! I am proud to be a pauper of God!  The way I see it, the more "poor" I am the "richer I will get spiritually!! 

What's Next To Do?

I have decided to start daily devotions from the book My Utmost For His Highest by Oswald Chambers!  I want a closer more personal walk with God!  So Today is the first day!

"If you know these things, blessed are you if you do them"  (John 13:17)

Be determined to know more than others.  If you yourself do not cut the lines that tie you to the dock, God will have to use a storm to sever them and to send you out to sea.  Put everything in your life afloat upon God, going out to sea on the great swelling tide of His purpose, and your eyes will be opened.  If you believe in Jesus, you are not to spend all your time in the calm waters just inside the harbor, full of joy, but always tied to the dock.  You have to get out past the harbor into the great depths of God, and begin to know things for yourself - begin to have spiritual discernment.

When you know that you should do something and you do it, immediately you know more.  Examine where you have become sluggish, where you began losing interest spiritually, and you will find that it goes back to a point where you did not do something you knew you should do.  You did not do it because there seemed to be no immediate call to do it.  But now you have no insight or discernment, and at the time of crisis you are spiritually distracted instead of spiritually self-controlled.  It is a dangerous thing to refuse to continue learning and knowing more.

The counterfeit of obedience is a state of mind in which you create you own opportunities to sacrifice yourself, and your zeal and enthusiasm are mistaken for discernment.  It is easier to sacrifice yourself than to fulfill your spiritual destiny, which is stated in Romans 12:1-2.  It is much better to fulfill the purpose of God in you life by discerning His will than it is to perform great acts of self-sacrifice.  "Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice..." (1 Samuel 15:22).  Beware of paying attention or going back to what you once were, when God wants you to be something that you have never been.  "If anyone wills to do His will, he shall know..." (John 7:17).


I have always believed in God, and tried living the life I thought was "good,"  but looking back, I didn't have the relationship I needed with him.  As a child I was not raised in a church environment, but when I was able to drive I started going to church on my own.  It has always been so frustrating to sit in a Sunday school class or a church sermon, and not understand what the lesson is on.  I, to this day, still don't know some of the most common Bible stories that children learned growing up.  When I read Taegan the stories out of his Children's Bible, not only is he learning something, but I am too.  I want so desperately to be able to walk in to an "adult" Sunday school and not just sit there lost as we are being taught the lesson.  I want to be able to participate in the discussions and know what I am talking about.  In doing these devotions, I pray I will be able to better understand things, and gain a closer intimate relationship in my walk with God.  Steve and I have been going to church here in Columbus every week, for a couple months now, and we hope to find a Sunday school class that best suits us.  I am so excited to get back in  a routine of going to Church!  I will admit that We didn't go as much as we should have back in SC, especially when Steve was gone to basic and AIT, and I know this is no excuse, but it was so hard to walk in that church service without Steve every Sunday.  I can't remember one time that I would go to a service and not cry because I didn't have my Steve with me.  Although the services were wonderful, my heart was just so broken, and I believe that is where my walk with God faded.  I am determined and very excited on getting back on track with my spiritual relationship, not only for myself, but for my family as well!  I want Taegan and Jocelyn to know, love and accept Jesus Christ as their Lord and Saviour.  I believe and know that they will lead by my example.  I want to show and teach them how precious a relationship with God is, not by me telling them, but by them seeing my relationship with him.  Prayers are more than welcomed, and much needed!  :)

day 15- put you ipod on shuffle: first 10 songs that play

1.  We Belong Together - Steven Curtis Chapman
2.  Sweet Child O' Mine - Guns N' Roses
3.  Remembering You - Steven Curtis Chapman
4.  Who Will Love Me - Tonic Sol-fa
5.  Stonger - Kanye West
6.  Cinderella - Steven Cutis Chapman
7.  Thriller - Michael Jackson
8.  Someday - Plain White T's
9.  I Will Be Here - Steve Curtis Chapman
10. Daughter - Pearl Jam

Lonely Days!

This has been a rather difficult week for me.  Taegan has been visiting in South Carolina without Steve and me!  We met Brenda and Wesley on their way to Mississippi because they wanted to get Taegan for what I thought was going to be a week.  I didn't realize until we met them and Cracker Barrel that they wanted to keep him for at least two. (Which is fine, it just kind of caught me off guard) I knew it was going to be hard being away from him, but I didn't know I would miss him so much so soon!  As soon as we were in the car leaving to come back home, I had tears in my eyes!  In my defense though, for the last 8 1/2 months I have been with him every single day. (minus the 3 or 4 days he went to SC in March) Yes, I still have Jocelyn with me, but now that she has her own little routine, I have no idea what to do with myself!  With Taegan, he kept me busy from 6 am until 9:30 pm without naps most days!  He wakes up every morning as soon as he sees that it's even the tiniest bit light outside.  He runs to our room and says "Mommy, it's light outside!"  He may or may not get in bed with me and watch Toodles, (Mickey Mouse Club House) it just all depends on how hungry he is!  Some mornings he doesn't mention it, but most he will say "Mommy, I'm real real hungry"  I'll ask what he wants and he will come down stairs look through our cabinets then open the fridge to look (he really is contemplating really hard on what he wants).  He will go back and forth until he finds exactly what he wants!  (or so I think)  I will get it for him, set it on his table, and 10 minutes later he's back in the kitchen getting something else!  This goes on literally ALL DAY!  By the end of the day I will have gotten him 2 bowls of Cocoa Pebbles, Cheese Puffs, 5 packs of Gummies, 10 dum-dums, Raviolis (UNCOOKED, he will not eat them if I heat them up), Popcorn, an apple, an orange, the food he takes from me because he thinks it's his, a nutrigrain bar, ice cream from the ice cream truck, a cup of chocolate milk, kool-aid, Juice, water (which he usually plays with, and we find his fish from the Let's go Fishing game in it because "it was thirsty").  This does not include the 5 pieces of balogna, 3 pieces of cheese, 2 lunchables, crackers, grapes, strawberries, and carrots he can get and open ALL BY HIMSELF!  You think I'm kidding when I say this is one day's worth of food, but ask anyone who has spent a day with him, they will tell you real quick that this is an everyday occurrence!

 From 6am until 2pm my TV is locked on Disney Channel.......No, he does not watch TV all day, he will glance at it as he plays, but mostly he is occupied with all his 10,000 toys spread across my house on a daily basis! However, if I even think about changing the channel, it doesn't matter if he is upstairs in his room playing, he will run down here and scold me and make me change it back!  When I say scold, he will say "Mommy, no sir, (because that what we tell him when he's doing something wrong) turn it back to Toodles!  One, Two......I'm going to pop you!"  (Notice he didn't say three.......that's because I never get to three when he's getting in trouble.  haha)  Or sometimes instead of him saying "I'm going to pop you" he will say "Go to timeout right now mommy!"  So inevitably, the channel changes back to Disney while he doesn't watch it and continues to play with his toys! 

When Barkley comes in in the afternoons to cool off, that's when Taegan ever so generously give him all of his uneaten food and when the real fun starts!!  I'm pretty sure those two share a brain when they are together!  When Taegan is getting into something (such as a tube of tooth paste) Barkley is right there beside him helping him!  Taegan will get on his little toy truck he scoots around on and tortures that poor dog by running him down!  Then he will get on his scooter skateboard and chase him for an hour straight and Barkley just plays right along!  They both love it and I love watching them......i just have to zone out the screaming portion of it all!  (oh, this is all while poor little Jocelyn is trying to take her naps, and if she's not taking a nap, she is just sitting there starring and them like they are insane!)

For the rest of the afternoon and evening there are various comments about things being "redicious"  (ridiculous), a lot of "no sirs" (to me and from me), tons of books he gets me to read to him, toys flying through the house, Taegan "flying" through the house on his toys, bunches of kisses and "she's a cute girl, mommy!" comments for sissy, and play time with daddy when he gets home from work!

Bath time - it's either a good things or an absolute horror story depending on if we wash his hair or not!  (seriously) Bubble baths are always his favorite, and he has loads of toys to play with.  He will spend an hour at least in the tub playing, but on the days we have to wash his hair, I'm almost positive we get a bath too!  Lots of kicking and screaming, and he will tell us to give him towel ever 2 seconds because he knows that water is in his eyes........even when his face is completely dry!  It's interesting to say the least!

Bed Time - He is so funny, he now will not go to bed until it is completely dark outside.  No matter how tired he is, he will watch the window until he can not see light anymore and say "it's dark now!"  Then and only then will he get into his bed!  We read him a story out of his Bible, he will say his prayers, and there will be a lot of "I love you's," "goodnights," "see you tomorrows," "sleep goods," and "see you laters!" (can you tell he's trying to stall?)  10 minutes later you will hear him yell for one of us to come up there.  When we get in there he says "I'm so thirsty"  our response "Taegan you just drank a whole cup of water" he then says "I'm so hungry".......how can you say no to that???  Thirty is one thing, but hungry???  So we now have a nightly routine where he gets a pack of crackers to eat in bed!  He thinks this is the most amazing thing ever, he loves have a bedtime snack IN BED!  (and by morning, the crackers are IN BED with him)  So funny!

I love my days with Taegan, he keeps me going everyday, so now you can see why I have been so lost and not knowing what to do with myself since he's been gone.  I'm so happy he is having so much fun with our family, and I wont cut his vacation short just because I miss him so much, but I can't wait to get him back!!

Day 14- A picture of you and your family

Me, Steve, Taegan, and Jocelyn

Alisha, Heather, Jake, Daniel, Josh, MawMaw, Mama, Me, Stephen, MawMaw Holman, Robert, Derek, Greg, Ricky, Michelle, Short Short, and Jamie

Mamaw Jan, Meme, Darrell, Wesley, Me, Stephen, Brent, Brenda, Mamaw Peggy, Papaw Ray, and Mamaw Ann!!

Me, Brenda, Wesley, Jenna, Taegan, Stephen, and Brent

Lisa, Kelly, Bill, Corey, and BJ

Cindy, Maddie, Lesleigh, Marleigh, and Amber

Heather, Kyle, Jay, and Ava

Cindy, Papaw Robert, Brenda

Cindy, Brenda, Mamaw Peggy, and Merita

Day 13- A letter to someone who has hurt you recently

Dear Life,
     I have found you to be quite challenging over the past 20 years.  It seems as though you have thrown things at me that no child should ever have to face in life, I grew up questioning who loved me and who didn't.  I saw things and went through things that only a handful of people know about in my life.  You have hurt me more times than I can ever count, and disappointed me even more.  Sometimes I think about the past, and never for a second do I wish to take anything back.  No matter how horrible any one situation was, I am PROUD of my background, and I am so happy of the person I have become, and the family I am raising!  I have met people throughout my life that have made a huge impact, and some that only came and went as fast as I met them, but everyone who has entered my life has molded me into who I am!  Whether it be because I wanted to be just like them, or because I knew when I saw them what NOT to become, I am so glad I met each and every person in my life!  Through my life, I have learned what I wanted in a husband, only because I saw so many times what a woman, ANY WOMAN should never have to go through.  I knew what I wanted for the father of my children, only because I witnessed things no CHILD should ever see.  I knew what kind of life I wanted for myself, only because I saw how hard life was for certain people, and I never wanted that.  I strived to better myself, and meet people that were "good!"  I knew exactly how I wanted to raise my children, and how to love, and care for them, and let them know that they will NEVER have to question whether we love them or not.  So honestly, Although I have been hurt by you, Life, I also am thankful because you taught me what not to settle for! I have an amazing family that I would give my life for!  We have been blessed beyond belief by our God!  Although I say I knew back then what I didn't want out of life, I never imagined God would give me such a wonderful life!  I love everything about it, and I'm sure it's only going to get better as I get older!  Bring on  the disappointments....they only make me stronger, and in the long run so much happier!!

Sincerly Yours,
Stephany

Day 12- how you found out about blogger and why you have one

After Taegan was born, my mother in law created one, and thought it was cute!  I decided to make one, but I didn't keep it up for a while, but after we moved to GA, away from everyone, I wanted to make sure everyone could see what's going on in our lives.  I still have trouble updating, but I am hoping to get better.


I had a wonderful Mother's Day weekend!!  Friday Steve's Parents came to visit us.  They got here around 1pm, and Taegan was so excited!!  Of course Nina and Papa fell in love with Jocelyn all over again, but let's be honest, who can love that girl?  :)  Taegan got to play his little heart out,and show them all the new stuff he knows how to do!  The boys went to the PX after Steve got home from work while Jocelyn,
Brenda, and I stayed home.  I showed Brenda all my ribbon I had to make bows, and she picked out some to make Marleigh a bow!  It was so cute, I hope she likes it!  When the boys got back, Taegan comes walking in with some gorgeous pink and white orchids!  He gave them to me, and said happy mothers day mommy!!  It was perfect!! 

Saturday I got up, and went to a few yard sales with a friend i met here!  came home, and we all packed up and went to the lake to fish!  Brenda snuggled with Jocelyn, while the rest of us were fishing.  Taegan's ADD set in though, so he went off to play with dirt, throw sticks in the water, and find pine apples AKA Pine cones!  haha  We saw some really cute baby ducks, and he started feeding them cheese crackers!  They absolutely loved them!  Wesley and Steve both caught a fish, so after that we all went to Red Lobster to eat lunch!  (my favorite restaurant EVER!!)  After that, they had to head back to SC, but it was a wonderful visit! 

Sunday I got up and made pancakes, bacon, eggs, then got ready for Church!  Church was so great, the perfect mother's day service!   Taegan stayed in his class for the whole Church service again!!  He has gotten a lot better about not wanting Steve and me to leave!  After Church, Steve said he wanted to cook me dinner, so we came back ad he started making baked spaghetti He did wonderful, all except he forgot the most important ingredient....the sauce!  haha  It was so cute!  We just heated the sauce and put it on top of the baked noodles, cheese, and meat!   :)  It was so yummy!!  Taegan colored me a card, and gave it to me, and he snuggled with me all day! 

I had the perfect Mother's Day Weekend!! 

day 11- Another picture of you and your friends

This is Mrs. Deanna Conrad!  I finally have a friend in Georgia!  I was so excited to meet her, and now Taegan has a friend too!  She has two beautiful children, Gary who is 2, and Peyton who is 7 months!  Taegan loves playing with "Barry" as he calls him.  Now I have someone to talk to and have "girl time" with her when I need a break from mommy 24/7!  :)

Day 10- songs you listen to when you are happy, sad, bored, hyped, mad

Well, since I have slacked off the past 2 months, I figured I should just pick up where I left off!

I listen to Christian music, light rock, and Taegan's music.

I don't have any particular songs I listen to for a certain mood that I'm in, so I'll just list a few of my favorites through the years, and tell you why they are so meaningful to me!

I Will Be Here - Steven Curtis Chapman - This is the song that was sang at my wedding! This is mine and Steve's offical song!

Pour Some Sugar on Me - Def Leppard - I just love the song...no reason in particular!

Stonger - Kanye West - When Steve was gone for AIT training, he told me he listened to this song to workout to, and ever since then I listen to it. I guess you could say it made me feel closer to him while he was gone for so long!

1, 2, 3, 4 - Plain White T's - Stephen taught Taegan how to sing this song for me. He goes around all the time now's singing "There's only one way, to say three words, and that's what I'll do, I love you!" It is so precious!

Far Away - Nickelback - I also listened to this song while Steve was gone to Basic and AIT.

Sweet Child O' Mine - Guns N' Roses - Steve sang this to Taegan while he played the guitar before he left for Basic!

You are my Sunshine - Steve sang this to me when Taegan and Jocelyn was being delivered.

Brown Eyed Girl - Van Morrison - Steve sang and recorded this song for me a couple months after we started dating!

Boulevard of Broken Songs - Green Day vs. Oasis - This is just an amazing song!! It's two songs in one!

There are so many other wonderful songs, but I just can't think of them right off.

There you have it, my favorite songs of all time! :)

There are so many other wonderful songs, but I just can't think of the names of them right now.

Taegan Wesley

So I updated on Miss Jocelyn, so now it's time for my Tae Tae!

He is one amazing little boy! He learns so much, and a lot of the stuff he knows, I have no idea where he learned it! Today, for example, he was playing with Nina (my mother-in-law)! They were playing with little farm animals, and Nina said that one of the animals was a cow. Taegan looked at it and, clear as day, he said no Nina, that's a bull! I'm sitting there thinking, where in the world did he learn what a bull is?? He amazes me every single day with random things that he knows! For him to be 3 in April, he is probably one of the smartest toddlers I have ever seen, and no, I'm really not being Bias when I say that!

About him:

- He sings constantly, and knows so many songs! He can hear a song once, and know it immediately!

- He remembers EVERYTHING! It doesn't matter if it was yesterday or 6 months ago, he remembers!

- He is so kind-hearted, and has such a loving personality! He does not hit or try to hurt anyone, like a normal toddler would!

- He loves being a big brother, and he loves to help with her!

- He has a wonderful Imagination!

- His favorite TV shows include: Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, Special Agent OSO, Handy Manny, Imagination Movers, Sponge Bob, and really any other cartoon on Disney and Nick!

- He loves watching Disney movies!

- He is so independent! He wants to do everything by himself, which is a good thing because that's how he learns!

- He is a huge Daddy's boy! When Daddy is around, he wont let me do anything!

- He is also a huge Nina fan! He loves his Nina more than anyone in this world!

- He sleeps with his bumpy blanket, BoBo (a stuffed monkey), his baby puppy and big puppy (both stuffed)! He will not go to sleep without them! Needless to say, he is no longer in a toddler bed, he has a full size bed for him and all his accessories!

- He says his prayer every night!

- His favorite food is Ice Cream!

- Although we've only let him try a taste of this a couple times, he loves coffee!

- He absolutely HATES hair cuts!

- He is off and on about baths. Sometimes he likes them , and other he can't stand them!

- He hates loud noises! ANY loud noise!

- He is VERY scared of spiders!

- He eats, literally, all day, and is still super skinny! I still don't think he has hit the 30 pound mark yet!

- He loves to play outside, and go to playgrounds!

- His favorite books are the ones Papa and Nina got him made for him with their voices!

- His favorite toy as of today is a little truck that he ride around on pretending it's an ice cream truck! He even hums a song while he is "driving" it, just like a real one!

- He is in love with our dog! They are best friends!

- He doesn't take naps anymore, unless he is just so tired that he falls asleep on his own!

- He sleeps 9 to 10 hours EVERY night!

- He is potty trained, no thanks to Steve and me! We tried for so long to get him to use the potty, but he just wouldn't, but one day he just up and started using it all by himself! He hasn't stopped since! He even holds in at night until he wakes up in the morning!

- He has to have a band aid on one of his fingers at all times even though he doesn't have a boo boo!

- He loves books, and for us to read to him multiple times a day!

That's all I can think of right now! He is such a special child! He has truly made Steve's and my life so wonderful! He makes us laugh constantly! I love that kid with everything I have to give and then some! I don't care how much he grows up, he will always be my baby boy!

Day 9: Something you're proud of in the past few days

I am very proud of my family! What can I say, they are the most important people in my life!

I know this is a short one, but honestly, that's all I have to say! :)

They are my everything!

I can't forget my very spoiled Barkley! :)

Already 1 month old!

It seems like time is passing me by so fast! I can not believe my baby girl is already a month old! I love Jocelyn so much, she has finally made our family 100% complete! Even though she is only a month, I could not ever imagine life without her!

A few things about her:

- She is eating 2 to 3 ounces every 3 or 4 hours

- I breast fed her up until two days ago, but my milk has completely ran out. I couldn't keep up with her! We finally decided to give her formula. We started her on Good Start, and it satisfies her more than my milk ever did! I feel horrible because I feel like I was starving her! She sucked that formula down like she hadn't eaten since she was born.

- She is out growing some of her newborn clothes, so she is starting to wear 0-3 month! She's growing way too fast! :(

- We just started to put size 1 diapers one her today. We are hoping that will solve the issue of leaking poopy!

- I think she weighs close to 8 pounds, but we won't know that until her two month check-up!

- She loves to be cuddled! She falls asleep on me all the time! Steve is a bit jealous because she is such a mommy's girl! She does sleep well when I lay her down though.

- She sleeps well at night, usually 4 to 5 hours at a time!

- He favorite comfort is to be held and to be bounced!

- She loves her paci, and I don't think she could sleep without one!

- She doesn't like her swing too much yet. She will sit in it for a few minutes, but then she wants out to be held, which is fine with me because I love to have cuddle time with her!

- She loves it when we sing to her, especially Taegan!

- She knows who I am! She will stare at me until she falls asleep!

- She know the sound of our voices, and she will look in our direction if she hears us talk!

- She sleeps on her tummy all the time!

- She lifts her head up, and holds it there for long periods of time!

- She pushes up a little when she is on her tummy with her arms.

- She loves Taegan, and he loves her so much!

- She really doesn't care too much for baths, but she doesn't do too bad with them. She just doesn't like being cold!

- She giggles in her sleep! It is the cutest sound I have ever heard! It makes me wonder what she dreams about!

One month old!

That's about it for now!

Taegan has been so good with her. He is so gentle, and he cares about her so much! He is always helping me with her! The sweetest thing was when i was upstairs, she started crying and I came down to get her. By the time I got down there, he had her bottle feeding her. He looked at me and said "Mommy, I feed sissy because she cried." When she cries he will jump up and give her her paci, and he will start singing to her! I can not describe how much that boy loves his sissy. He has such a sweet heart! I love him so much! We have been so blessed with two amazing children!

This is what I found when I came down stairs!!

day 8: Short term goals for this month and why

I will do my short term goal for the month of March seeing as how we only have a couple more days left in February! For the month of March I would like to:




I want to look like this again! This was the year before I got pregnant with Taegan!


1. Lose the rest of this baby weight.
2. Take care of Steve to the best of my ability after his surgery Monday, and make sure he has the most relaxing 30 days off work as possible!
3. Get myself back into a NORMAL routine! I'm still getting used to the whole two kids thing! :)
4. Keep this blog updated!!
5. Give my dog a bath! haha, it's bad when I have to put that down as a goal! I just don't have time anymore!
6. I want to finally be able to go to church again, but we will have to see how Steve is healing, and if he will be able to move around that much after his surgery!
That's it for now, I may have to add to this list as the month starts!

day 7- a picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you

This woman right here has been the strongest, most influential lady I have ever known! My mom has had one of the hardest lives I have ever seen, and yet she still drives on! She is NOT a quitter! I love my mother so very much, and just recently I realized how wonderful that mother/daughter bond really is! Being as how I have a little princess myself now, I completely understand how a mother loves her daughter so much! My mother has taught me so much in my life. Just from watching her throughout my life, I learned to be a fighter, how to be independent, and a hard worker, but most of all she taught me to be the woman, wife, and mother I am today!

You never realize as a child, or even a teenager how much your mother impacts your life! I didn't realize it until I became a mother! I found myself raising my children with the same morals and "rules" that I grew up with! My mother is the greatest woman I have ever known, and she always will be! She has sacrificed so much of her life to take care of her family. At one point, when I was a little kid, I remember he working three jobs at a time just to provide for my brother and I! She raised us by herself with little to know help from anyone, and I am so grateful to be able to say I have a mother who has loved me unconditionally no matter what I have ever done!

I love you Mama! You are such an amazing woman, and I pray that I am at least half the person you are!!

day 6: favorite super hero and why

My all time favorite super hero is my wonderful loving husband! I know, I know...not the famous "super hero" type, but he is honestly the best one I have ever loved! :) Stephen has been in my life for five years this coming April, and I can say it has been the most challenging, difficult, rewarding, best five years of my life!

Before I met him I was doing alright. I was in a relationship that I knew in my heart was never going to last, but I couldn't get out because, as always, I was afraid of hurting people! I had a good job, but I just simply was not happy with my life. I felt like I was just stuck, and I couldn't go anywhere. Then, Stephen came along and opened my eyes. From day one I knew he was my "Hero!"

My life changed, I was happy again! I knew within just a few day I would spend the rest of my life with him! Eight months later we were engaged, and 6 months after that, we were married! Best decision I could have ever made!

We have had a lot of tough times, and a lot of downs, but nothing we couldn't handle! The good as always out-weighed the bad....ALWAYS!! He has always done everything in his power to take care of me, and make me happy! He constantly shows me he loves me, even if it's just a simple kiss on the cheek! I never second guess any decisions we've ever made because I know with him, we can get through anything and come out 100 times stronger! He has given me 2 amazing children, and a life to where I am able to stay home with them!

To me, Stephen is my all time favorite "super hero!" That will never change! My life is complete, happy, and healthy all because of him! Thank you Stephen Wesley Burcham for saving me and being my hero!!

Day 5: A picture of somewhere I have been!

Alright, so I kinda slacked for the last few days, but in my defense, I have been super busy!! We had a wonderful weekend! My brother and sister in law came to visit us, and meet Jocelyn! We had a great time with them, and they were so sweet! They let Steve and I have a little break for a couple hours! It was so nice to get out and just relax, but honestly, all we did was go to Walmart! When we got there we actually contemplated on weather to sit out in the parking lot and take a nap, or go in and walk around! It was a very tough choice because we were both just so exhausted! We finally got out of the car and walked around the store for a few minutes, but we went straight back to the car and sat there and just talked for a little bit. Although it was only a couple hours, it was a much needed break! We hated that they had to leave so soon, and so early on Sunday, but hopefully we will be able to visit SC in a couple of weeks!

Alright, so for my day 5 challenge, Steve and I took the kids to the Riverwalk in downtown Columbus yesterday! It was absolutely gorgeous, and so peaceful there! Taegan loved seeing the water, but he saw a lot of people fishing and he said he want his fishing pole! haha It was so fun getting out like that, and just enjoying the day with my family! We ate lunch, and just walked around for 2 hours! Jocelyn did great, although I didn't get her out of her stroller because it was so windy! I think Steve and I are going to start going there from now on! We hope to find a playground somewhere around there! That would make it perfect!! :)

Day 4: A bad habit I wish I didn't have!

I honestly do not know of a bad habit that I have! If anyone can tell me one, then please let me know! I guess I can say I have a bad habit of not keeping in touch with people especially when I get extremely busy. It just slips my mind! I don't know, that's all I could think of!

Day 3: A picture of me and my friends!

This is Alyssa and me. She has been my very best friend going on 11 years now! She is the most amazing best friend and person I have ever met! I have no idea what kind of people I would be hanging around, or what kind of trouble I would have gotten into if we never met! Alyssa is such an inspiration, and a wonderful influence on everyone she comes in contact with! We always have so much fun together, and I'm sure we will continue to be best friends for the rest of our lives! She is the one person I can always call and talk to when I'm having a hard time, and she will never judge me for anything I have done that she may not agree with! I love her dearly, and would do anything for her. She is an amazing wife, and I know she will be a wonderful mother when she decides to have children of her own someday!! I love you Alyssa D. Wolff Byars!!! :)

Day 2: The meaning behind my blog name!

Well, It's rather simple really! My blog is called "Burcham Life: My Life, My Thoughts" I created this in order to keep people updated on my life. Although I'm not doing a very good job at keeping it updated! haha I do enjoy writing in this, but it's just a lot of work while trying to take care of two children, and a dog all day, plus doing all the other house hold chores, and errands! I have spent one hour just trying to type this much just because I've had to stop and change diapers, feed babies, empty big boy potties, among other things. People think being a stay at home mom is a simple task, and that we don't do anything, but its the complete opposite! We are constantly on the go, and I am more busy these days then I have ever been in my life! So if you come home to a messy house, and a stay at home mom, don't assume she has done nothing. Usually if the house gets clean, that because she had a little down time from trying to take care of everyone and everything else. :) Now back to the meaning of my blog name! It's basically just saying "this is me, my life." See, told you it's rather simple! haha

Day 1: A recent picture of me and 15 random facts about myself!

1. I shave my arms!

2. I am only 25 years old and already have my tubes tied because I will NOT risk having a miscarriage and not know it! Jocelyn was our little miracle baby! We came way too close to losing her and not even knowing it could have happened!

3. Out of all the jobs I have had in my lifetime, I can honestly say that being a stay at home mom is the hardest most challenging job I have ever had, but I absolutely love being able to be home with my children!

4. I am a Christian, and very proud to let anyone and everyone know it!

5. I had the biggest crush on Stephen when I was a freshman in high school (back in 2000). I moved into his neighborhood, and took my baby sister on walks just to pass by his house......I didn't realize it was him until one of my high school friends started dating him. We never talked much, and it wasn't until April 13, 2006 that we started dating! A year after that, we got married!

6. I love to cook, and can cook anything as long as I don't have to follow a recipe! For some reason I always mess up recipes, but as long as I get an idea on how to cook something, I make up my own way to make it and it's usually taste pretty good!

7. I absolutely love taking care of people! I am a certified nursing assistant, and I loved working in a nursing home taking care of all my residents! I always got so attached to all of them, which was good, but bad at the same time.

8. I would do anything to make my family happy, and to protect them! They are my everything.

9. I was forced to eat tomatoes as a child, and now I can not stand to even smell them. They make me so sick!

10. My favorite TV shows consist of Army Wives, Pretty Little Liars, Secret Life of an American Teenager, Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, Handy Manny, and Veggie Tales!

11. I have only been to 8 states in the US. South Carolina, North Carolina, Tennessee, Georgia, Florida, Alabama, Mississippi, and Texas. I need to travel more!

12. I flew on an airplane for the first time in my life when I was 23 years old, and I absolutely loved it! I can't wait to fly again!

13. I love taking pictures, but I am never in the picture! I'm always the one behind the camera!

14. I love that my son, Taegan, shocks me everyday with something new he has learned! It amazes me at how smart he is!

15. I am a devoted wife and mother! There is nothing I enjoy more than being with my family, and taking care of them!

30 days of me!

I came across this and figured it would be fun to do! I will start today, and atempt to do it everyday for thirty days! :)


Here are the daily prompts for 30 days of me:
day 1- recent picture of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself
day 2- the meaning behind you blog name
day 3- a picture of you and your friends
day 4- a habit that you wish you didn’t have
day 5- a picture of somewhere youve been to
day 6- favorite super hero and why
day 7- a picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you
day 8- short term goals for this month and why
day 9- something youre proud of in the past few days
day 10- songs you listen to when you are happy, sad, bored, hyped, mad
day 11- another picture of you and your friends
day 12- how you found out about blogger and why you have one
day 13- a letter to someone who has hurt you recently
day 14- a picture of you and your family
day 15- put you ipod on shuffle: first 10 songs that play
day 16- another picture of yourself
day 17- someone you would want to switch lives with for one day and why
day 18- plans/dreams/goals you have
day 19- nicknames you have and why you have them
day 20- someone you see yourself marrying or being with in the future
day 21- a picture of something that makes you happy
day 22- what makes you different from everyone else
day 23- something you crave for a lot
day 24- a letter to your parents
day 25- what I would find in your bag
day 26- what do you think about your friends
day 27- why are you doing this 30 day challenge
day 28- a picture of you from last year and now, how have you changed since then?
day 29- in this past month, what have you learned
day 30- you favorite song

One of the funniest moments EVER!

When Taegan woke up this morning he told me he had to go potty, so I told him to go! I wasn't paying any attention to him, but he said he was going to pee pee like daddy, which he says a lot, so I thought nothing of it! I was trying to upload a video to facebook when all of a sudden I heard this stream of pee pee going into his potty!! I look up and he is STANDING over his potty just pee peeing away!! He has great aim because he didn't make a mess at all! If that wasn't shock to me enough, Steve has apparently shown him how to "shake it off" when he is finished. He finished his business then he took his hand and just shook himself a little and closed the lid to his potty!! It was so so funny! He was so proud of himself!! I don't think I have ever seen anything as funny as this! I have the greatest son EVER!!

This past weekend Steve took Taegan to the pet store to look at all the little animals. It's one of Taegan's favorite things to do now! I get a phone call asking if they can bring home a fish, so we now have a pet beta fish that Taegan has named Ping! He was very excited about it, and he loves to feed him!

I have my last doctor appointment tomorrow before Jocelyn gets here!! Only 5 days left!!! Steve's parents are coming into town Saturday, and the rest of the families are coming Monday! We are so excited!! This week seems to be going by so slow though, the anticipation is awful!!

Just thought I would do a little update while I had a little time on my hands!! I hope everyone enjoys Tae Tae's pee pee story!! :) Have a great day!

9 more days!

I can not believe Jocelyn will be here in 9 days!! I went to the pediatric cardiologist last week to get an ultra sound of her heart. If you don't know already then here is the story! When we went to find out that she was a girl, we also were told that she had a rare but the most easily fixed heart defect called VSD (Ventricular Septal Defect). They told us she had two holes in her heart that would more than likely close on their own as she grows in my belly, but if they didn't they would have to do surgery to close them when she turned one. I had to go to the Maternal/ Fetal Medicine doctor every week to get her heart looked at and to see if they were closing. A few weeks before we moved to Fort Benning they told us that the holes appeared to be closed but they could be positive until she was born. Well, when I moved here my OBGYN wanted me to go see a pediatric cardiologist to get a definite answer, and so I did! PRAISE GOD......Her heart is perfect! The holes closed on their own! We are so blessed to have such a wonderful God taking care of our precious little Angel! She has put us through a lot of scary stuff this entire pregnancy, but everything has turned out perfect, and it looks as though we couldn't have asked for a more healthy baby girl so far! With that being said.....I will have my tubes tied when I have my c section because I physically and mentally can not go through another pregnancy like this one! I couldn't bare the thought of almost losing my child and not even know it again! We are perfectly happy with our amazing son, and soon to be daughter! Our family is officially complete!

We are very much looking forward to this next week to come.....getting everything prepared and ready for her to come, and our families coming into town! We can't wait to spend time with everyone! We are so thankful to have such supportive family and friends in our lives! We couldn't have gotten through this pregnancy mentally if it weren't for most of them, and all the prayers that were sent up for us! We are truly blessed beyond belief! Thank you to everyone in our lives who have been there for us and prayed for us , and continue to pray for us! you all are so amazing!! We love you!!

We can't wait to meet you Jocleyn BreAnn!!! We love you so very much!!

A fresh new start!

Our family is still going through so many wonderful changes!! We have officially moved to Fort Benning Georgia, and we absolutely love it! We hate being away from all of our families, but we could not have asked for a better work schedule for Steve! He is home everyday by 5 pm, I get to stay home with Taegan....not that I had a choice in that matter because of the complications of this pregnancy, but we actually have enough income from Steve's job that I don't have to work! It wonderful being able to stay here and not worry about our income! I don't know what we would have done if he didn't go active army, and me having to be forced to not work!

We are still trying to get our house sold, but in God's time it will happen! We are loving the house we live in now, and the best part is there are no inconsiderate neighbors! It's nice to be able to go to bed at a decent time and not have to listen to your neighbors scream, or here there music blasting your windows out!

Taegan is enjoying himself here, I think it's because we can have Barkley inside more, and they have become absolute best friends! One can not live without the other! He learns new things EVERYDAY! He is so so smart, it amazes Steve and I what he knows just by watching or hearing us do something! He picks up on things so fast! BUT he is the most stubborn kid I know! I have been trying to work with him in potty training for so long, and on January 11th he just up and decides he wants to start using the potty! Ever since, he has not wet his diaper once!!! He is now in big boy underwear!! We are so proud of him! We couldn't have been more blessed with any other son! God specially chose him just for us!

Jocelyn should be here anytime now! I am scheduled to have a c-section on January 25th...ONLY 12 DAYS!!!! We are thrilled! I had my cerclage removed last Tuesday, which I do not recommend to ANYONE!! I'm pretty sure that pain was worse than any labor pains I have every had!! We were thinking she might come that day, but she decided to stay in and stay cozy...I guess she knows how cold it is right now! :) We are already so in love with her, and she is already so spoiled by EVERYONE!! I guess that what she gets for scaring us so bad! I can not wait to hold her and cuddle her! Steve is already wrapped around her tiny little fingers......I can't wait to see what he is going to be like when she is actually here! Taegan is super excited to be getting a baby sister! He has chosen to call her sissy! We asked him if he wanted to call her Jocelyn or Sissy, and he said sissy! He is going to be such a wonderful big brother!! He is so sweet and kind hearted already! I think he will be very protective of her as well!!

Steve had to get a CT scan the other day to see how bad his hernia was, and he got the results yesterday. It turns out that he has one for sure hernia, and three more tears in his abdominal wall. I know he is so uncomfortable. Poor baby. :( He is going to have to have surgery to get them fixed, but he is going to try to push it back until maybe the end of February so I will have a little bit of time to recover. We don't want to both be cut up at the same time....especially not with a toddler, a newborn, and a dog! He has been such a great husband! He has taken care of me, and cooked and cleaned when I cant! He doesn't even complain about it. It makes me feel horrible when I can't do stuff for him, or just simply clean all the toys up out of the floor before he gets home everyday, but I honestly can not bend over anymore....and he just comes home and does it like it's nothing! He is a wonderful man, fabulous husband, and even better daddy!! Taegan and Jocelyn are so blessed to have him as their daddy!!

I can't wait to get Jocelyn here and recover so we can start going back to SC more! I haven't been able to travel a lot with this pregnancy, but we miss our families so much!! I think we are both homesick for everyone! It's hard to not be able to just drive 10 minutes and be able to hangout with someone we know, and I do get lonely quite a bit, but I think that's more because I am not able to do much anymore. I get tired to easily, but that will soon change!! :)

God is so great, he has blessed our lives to the fullest, and provided for us more than we could ever imagined!! Without him in our lives, we would have nothing at all!!